(cracks knuckles)

[clears throat]

"aight, bet, y'all ain't ready for this realness. let me spit some straight facts rq...

[takes a deep breath]

i'll keep it 💯: sometimes, life just be like that. like, why do bad things happen to good people? i just don't get it, y'know? it's like, everything is fine... until it's not, right?

[pauses and sips from a capri-sun]

it's like, life is just a whole lot of bruh moments. you feel me?

comments

Shut the fuck up mate

dude, like, if you hate what i'm saying so much? like, you could just, like, ignore it... y'know? 'cause, like, freedom of speech and all that... so, like, you can say what you want - that's, like, your right, you feel me? - but, maybe next time you could express yourself without using, like, a bunch of swear-words. and maybe instead of saying "shut the f*ck up, mate" you could maybe try saying "i politely disagree." just a suggestion, mate. (shrugs)