@luckythecat

WE ARE SO BACK

@owl

vote soupleeeeeeeee

so my friend’s brother got like a concussion and possibly a brain bleed today which is really bad and I feel really bad for him but um the way my friend told us was…. yeah…

@earthdevs can you fix the bug where the dogs always bark at you but when you go home and get them dog treats and come back they aren’t in their yard anymore

i’m finally above average yay

I watched this movie once about these smart gals who went on to work at NASA as mathematicians. it showed one scene where one girl was counting how many steps it took to get to school, and counted everything or whatever

is that so weird? doesnt everyone do that? there were 153 dragons I could see in the Chinese place yesterday

literally the only time I text either one of my brothers it’s about either food or our dog

I keep seeing guys with dark sunglasses today

one of them saw me looking at him and just nodded. very mysteriously I tell you

help

one of my friends was at someone’s house in their backyard for a barbecue thing and they had chickens in their yard and he accidentally dropped his fried chicken and a bunch of the live chickens came over and ate it

my dog has this takeout box in the fridge entitled “Arwen’s ossuary of delights”

I like being a normal person doing normal friend things for once

it’s crazy how much my humor has been influenced by Kevin McCallister, Mark Watney, and Ryan Trahan

can someone please tell me why I keep finding new ways to talk to random faceless strangers