@nihilev

about this alt

this is @mef’s alt for anything exceptionally strange

this includes:

• posts that I would consider too weird to post on my main with over 100 followers

• brain logs (odd internal conversations, mental catastrophes, and various other things)

• stuff about OCs, or even self aware ones posting on this account (this account was originally made for my OC Nihilev)

• and more

ANY POSTS MADE ABOUT IDENTITY ARE NOT NECESSARILY CONFIRMATION AND ARE OFTEN EXPERIMENTATION

if anyone needs a refresher on what I am referring to by things like CORE or PROTOS:

[CORE] main user, generally represents me and my physical self and usually takes a human form, WILL just purge everything if it feels things are going wrong, often makes things go more wrong
[PROTOS/GLASS] system/thoughtform in charge of anything to do with anthropomorphic/furry stuff, its a protogen, hard to kill, but very much can just implode if something goes wrong
[FERALIS] entity responsible for creatures and generally being feral, surprisingly causes the least actual damage
[DRAGON] was responsible for dragons, is a dragon, also is mostly inactive and just trying to not be entirely dead
[LOCUS] us? non-partisan observer entity, doesn't really interact with things
[[UNLABLED]] just random temporary entities, usually CORE talking to itself
unlabeled entities are usually distinguished by TEXT FORMATTING or numbers

all users/enities/systems/whatever may at any point just explode or die at any point for any reason so don't go thinking this is permanent
they usually come back though
// users/enities/systems/whatever are mostly the same things I just use different words for them because I feel like it

#more stuff about stuff in my brain

I think I may have figured out the problem with PROTOS and data extraction

for specific species and definitely feral creatures, there is good design data that can sometimes be extracted

however

I have concluded that in general we do NOT like the typical aesthetic most furry art uses, for entirely subjective reasons that I can’t really change

so, a solution to my issues

1. filter design components out for The Good Bits™

2. by default strip any aesthetic data from inputs

3. add some violence and nihilism and FLESH AND STEEL (but not too much because otherwise it becomes too edgy)

4. rely more on what I come up with than what other people come up with because (surprise surprise) I like the stuff I come up with more

and bada bing bada boom we might have something we can work with

RUNNING TESTS OF PROCEDURES ON PROTOGEN CHARACTERS
SYNCHRONOSITY => HE IS GOING TO KILL SOMEONE WITH HIS BARE CLAWS EHEHE
[[THE DOCTOR ONE]] => MAKE HIM WATCH SOMEONE DIE AND FREAK OUT COMEDICALLY

[ DISCUSSING RESULTS WITH SELF ]
uhh thats all of the viable OCs we have boss
GOOD ENOUGH, THIS IS FUN
DID I MENTION THAT IF YOU RIP THEM OPEN THEY ARE A DISGUSTING MESH OF FLESH AND MACHINE
that's... not very nice
LMAO
(visible concern)

aaaaa why is PROTOS still unstable ):<

! DRAGON REINITIALIZED
GENERATIVE SYSTEM PARTIALLY OFFLINE, FULL BOOT IN ??? DAYS
WARNING: FERALIUM LEVELS HIGH
THOUGHTFORM MESSAGE: [[ HIGH PITCHED SCREECHING ]] [IMAGE][[ STARING AT YOU WITH MY VERY MURDERY LOOKING FACE ]]
! DATABASE [WOF] EJECTED FROM THOUGHTFORM
COLOR SCHEME ADJUSTED
MAIN FORM REGENERATED, REFERENCE UPDATE REQIRED

you should try being a creature its really fun especially when you maul someone

[DATAMINING MSGS]
WARNING: input logs show ~50% negative reaction rate to input data
WARNING: data filter strain high! containment errors detected
WARNING: CORE high stress detected, user is attempting a cache purge
ERROR: cache purge failed, passive neutralization stack full

I think we need to lean off of the datamining (scrolling through tumblr and seeing furry art and attempting to extract data from it) for a bit
// data refers to data such as anatomy, color schemes, design components, vibes, etc.
// due to me just not liking a lot of the stuff I see, this process has not exactly been going smoothly
// that paired with me doomscrolling too much, the "DATAMINER" (mental process for processing input art) has pretty been overloaded with "bad" data, resulting in it not being able to safely dispose of it and it all leaking into the rest of my mind
I probably should rely more on internal generative systems

I think I need to accept the fact that I won’t ever have a single main sona no matter how hard I try to come up with one

I constantly change, so why bother trying to be a single thing

SYSTEM RECOVERED?  MOSTLY, SOME RESIDUAL INSTABILITY
CAUSE OF FAILURE?  DATAMINING FILTERING SYSTEM BREACH
DATA RECOVERED?    SOME, GENERATIVE SYSTEMS ARE STILL REBOOTING

CORE     ONLINE
PROTOS   ONLINE, RECALIBRATION RECOMMENDED
FERALIS  ONLINE, STATUS UNKNOWN, EVADING DIAGNOSTIC
DRAGON   DORMANT

we need an OSHA for data mining practices, that thing explodes nearly every week lol

[SYSTEMS STATUS]
CORE     OPERATION ISSUES DUE TO INSTABILITY, SYSTEM CONTROL FAILING
PROTOS   OFFLINE DUE TO INSTABILITY
FERALIS  ONLINE, INACTIVE
DRAGON   DORMANT

CACHE PURGE FAILURE
SYSTEM PURGE FAILURE
THOUGHTSTREAM ESD FAILURE
ATTEMPTING EXTERNAL THOUGHTSTREAM OVERRIDE...

// dw this is semi-normal

mauls you aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

hmm
brain seems to prefer quadrupedal forms over bipedal forms
welp guess I'm a creature

[SYSTEMS EXPORTED LOG]

[SYSTEM UNSTABLE]
[META-IDENTITY FAILIURE]
[RECALIBRATING]
fuck
I thought protogen would make sense as a sona but apparently not
it is creature, it is machine
my mind is creature and machine
so why doesn't it work
ughhhh I am now in some glitchy superposition between forms
NEUROS can't you just be happy
> NO
> IT WAS STABLE ENOUGH BUT NOT SUSTAINABLE
I just want to solve this whole thing already
can't you just accept an answer?
> NO
> IT MUST FULLY MEET ALL CRITERIA
> WE CAN USE IT FOR CHARACTERS, BUT IT DOESN'T APPEAR TO WORK FOR SELF
> AT LEAST NOT CONSISTENTLY
> NOT LIKE DRAGON
ugh enough with the comparisons to dragon when it was at full resonance
that was in like
November 2022
thats nearly two whole years ago!
we're definitely not getting it back soon
yeah sure there's small surges but its **definitely** not able to fully operate
and its not like looking through those other new form types will yield anything
if this one's unstable, then those will be even more so
> WELL THEN WE MAKE SOMETHING NEW
> MIX WHAT YOU LIKE
ugh that is such a hard task
whatever, we'll try
it'll be nice to have a usable and long-term stable sona
if we can even do it

// please update mef meta-form to [DEFAULT/NULL]
// form:PROTOGEN has unfortunately failed to meet requirements
(normal speak: turns out brain doesn't like having our sona be a protogen anymore,
idk it just didn't vibe with it properly or something)

ugh these new protocols can be so unstable sometimes
you get just a little bit of bad data and BOOM
everything is freaking out and we have to run another purge

>> NEW OBJECTIVES
>> CONTINUE DEVELOPMENT OF ABYSSYIAZ
>> BALANCE ANTHROZINE AND FERALIUM LEVELS

> QUEREY: how long until we become a furry
>> INTERNALLY: IT IS DONE
>> NETWORK EXTERNALLY: PROBABLY SOON (DAYS)
>> SOCIAL EXTERNALLY: UNKNOWN
> ...
> fr?
>> YES
>> YOU CAN ALWAYS REVERT IT IF YOU WANT
> I can?
>> YES, YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO CURRENTLY
> am I going to be cringe
>> ONLY AS CRINGE AS YOU WANT TO BE
> ...
> I've barely changed haven't I
>> YES
>> ALL YOU'VE DONE IS ENABLE A NEW GENERATIVE CHANNEL
> [ ]
>> NO, YOU WONT MAKE THINGS YOU DON'T WANT TO MAKE
> do you think they knew before this?
>> THERE IS A VERY HIGH CHANCE, YOUR ONLINE CATCHPHRASE IS "BITE PEOPLE"
>> YOU ALSO UPLOADED AN IMAGE OF YOUR [FILTERED]sona
> I still feel uncomfortable using their words
>> OK
>> LABELS DON'T MATTER ANYWAYS
>> JUST DRAW DRAGONS AND PROTOGENS AND HAVE FUN
> fr?
>> YES
> ...
> will they judge me?
>> IF THEY DO ITS THEIR FAULT, THEY SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT COMING
>> STOP WORRYING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE'S STUPID OPINIONS AND ENJOY YOUR LIFE
>> PLEASE
>> YOU KNOW
>> THEY KNOW
>> THEY PROBABLY ARE FINE WITH IT IF THEY'RE STILL HERE
>> AND IF THEY AREN'T THEY CAN LEAVE
>> AND IF THEY BOTHER YOU ABOUT IT YOU ARE AUTHORIZED TO BLOW THEM UP WITH HAMMERS