any time i type the word boring 
this plant emoji shows up in my autocorrect
what did the poor plant do to you
learning a slavic language is fun until you get sent to albuquerque by the albuquerque boogeyman
here’s to another bimontly (twice a month, not once every 2 monts (also ignore the anomaly that is april)) post
you should eat a baked potato
nature valley bars try not to explode into 82 vigintillion crumbs challenge (impossible)
im node.js but without the .js and also with ols
awesome without wesome, a u found abandoned under a bridge, an r that rolled down a hill near my least favourite toothpaste museum, an i which was seen lying on the pavement near my favourite deli, an extra a (cloned with a futuristic device i have acquired via a time machine i built), an l found loitering near the local tesco metro, and another i (cloned via the aforementioned futuristic device i have acquired via a time machine i built) is me
