comments (single view)
Be the change. If you notice a problem, you should take action; it’s not fair to blame others for doing something that you yourself do, too.
In other words, yes, Lily has just as much power as anyone else to disengage. Given that she is also aware that it’s a problem (some people might not know they’re adding to the problem), she does have a bit more control over whether she adds to it or not.
I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: I don’t know why Lily returns here if most of the interactions she has with others come out negative. It’s just not worth the negative energy to keep coming back here. It’s a bad trade-off.
Now, I’m in no place to lecture her on what she should and shouldn’t do with her time. I just think that a good deal of her distress on this website could probably be resolved by keeping in touch with her friends on a different platform.
I agree with you, I just felt like he was pinning the blame entirely on her. I don’t disagree that quite a few posts do seem quite bait-y, but at the same time it’s a shame that there’s so many people ready to swarm on her posts, it’s really toxic behavior.
I don’t know what else I can do outside of making posts discouraging toxic behavior and report people, both of which I have already done.
Yea, Oren’s initial comment does seem to suggest that Lily is solely to blame (not sure if that was how he meant it to be read, though).
And yes, I agree; some of Lily’s post are (in my opinion) provocative. That is one component, but the other component (as you also mention) is people readily jumping onto posts and reacting and whatever. If neither of those things existed (a provocative post/people eager to react) this probably wouldn’t happen.
I think you’ve done well at encouraging a more positive environment here. Anything more would probably seem like imposing on others.
i feel as though the reason that is is because i’m autistic and i don’t see that quality in my posts (would be cool if people did the thing oren said (minus the entirely blaming me, that’s uncalled for) which is just not replying)
Oren wasn’t, he was just saying that “two wrongs don’t make a right!” I fail to see what he did wrong?
I did feel pretty bad about initiating another conversation, but I just wanted to add on what I thought about the situation
I’m glad things ended peacefully
i already do? please stop acting like you know me, it's really weird and parasocial. i posted one post as a joke and as soon as i did 20 different people were on my [case] about it. i’m only posting because i’d like to see the actual real issue with this site solved. if jeffalo actually doesn’t care he should delete it.
I did not indicate that I knew you. I only made a comment based on my knowledge of what I observed in the past. Feel free to let me know where I stated that I “know you,” because my intention was not to make you feel uncomfortable in that way.
I could name a couple other posts that seem to invite responses, but neither I nor you seem eager to argue about something like this.