@kiwi | wasteof.money 4

way back when i was just a little bitty boy livin in a box under the stairs in the corner of the basement of the house half a block down the street from jerry’s bait shop

Dec 7, 2024, 3:37 AM

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@kiwi Dec 11, 2024, 1:45 AM

except that i had to sit between two large albanian women with excruciatingly severe body odor

@noodle Dec 11, 2024, 1:53 AM

and the little kid in the back of me kept throwing up the whole time

@kiwi Dec 11, 2024, 3:48 AM

the flight attendants ran out of dr. pepper and salted peanuts

@noodle Dec 11, 2024, 2:38 PM

and the in flight movie was BIO-DOME with PAULY SHORE

@kiwi Dec 11, 2024, 5:49 PM

and, oh yeah, three of the airplane engines burned out and we went into a tailspin and crashed into a hillside AND THE PLANE EXPLODED IN A GIANT FIREBALL AND EVERYBODY DIED

ᵉˣᶜᵉᵖᵗ ᶠᵒʳ ᵐᵉ

@noodle Dec 11, 2024, 7:01 PM

you know why?

cause i had my tray table up

and my seat back in the full upright position

had my tray table up

and my seat back in the full upright position

had my tray table up

and my seat back in the full upright position

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