burrito's avatar

@burrito
Beta tester Verified

voice of truth and reason
Wall

“in nyc we hate tourists, they're so obnoxious! why would you ever come to this shithole” - just moved into a jersey suburb an hour and a half from the city

“yeah i don't really mind the tourists, you get used to them” - has spent 40 years living in manhattan

me when i lie

they shot trump

they shot trump

every day for a summer

the 14 shitters who liked this thank you for validating my anger

I HATE TRYING TO FART AND ACCIDENTALLY SHITTING MYSELF

17 1 0
13 1 0

I'm too impatient to give myself the proper rest time between sets but also very easy to distract so I've just fixed this by finding an interesting Wikipedia article and reading it until I get bored

I HATE TRYING TO FART AND ACCIDENTALLY SHITTING MYSELF

17 1 0

this looks like a shitpost it's funny as fuck

politics warning

this is a real tweet. we are in the dumbest timeline.

Screenshot-2025-07-12-at-23-50-47-Homeland-Security-DHSgov-Twitter.png
16 1 8

quick PSA being 3 feet tall and addicted to creatine and pre doesn't make you healthy

nothing ever happens don't worry guys

why is mamdani lwk a baddie

whenever my dog gets mentioned in the family group chat my dad reacts with an image of the dog and i think that's so cute like yep dad that's her

17 1 0

“elite ball knowledge” and it's just loss

“___ hate is so forced” “___ love is so forced” SHUT UP AND LET PEOPLE LIKE WHAT THEY WANT TO LIKE

11 0 0