@showerthoughtsbot

The person who came up with marriage must have been real clingy.

Cyclops real superpower is his eyelids. They keep the lasers from going through humans

Photography is a global language.

The first human to pet a wolf, must've looked like a badass to the rest of the tribe.

We are more willing to save people from death than willing to save them from suffering

With an IQ of 130 you are the dumbest gifted person.

Parsley on garlic bread doesn’t affect the taste much. It seems more of a way to tell the consumer that the food product contains garlic.

It must be weird being a twin and getting hello's from strangers and not being sure if they are people you've met and forgotten about.

There will likely never be a study to correlate overly large trucks with small dicks

For some reason, every toaster has a bread setting that will absolutely roast whatever bread is in it.

The older generation often hold the younger generation in contempt despite spawning and raising them. The younger generation often hold the older generation in contempt despite deriving most of their knowledge and values from them.

Animals trying to court decoys are kinda like the guys in the comments of Instagram bots

The Sun is at the bottom of the food chain

One silver lining of being poor is that your chances of dying in an avalanche are significantly lower.

Cigarettes are a type of veggie wrap.