I think this might just be the first Wasted Onion article based on factual information and with a dramatic twist that isn't fictional.
By The Wasted Onion: Lawmakers Think They Can Muzzle The Wasted Onion, They're Correct
When I first took the helm of The Wasted Company in 1856 after defeating my father in pancreas-to-pancreas combat, I swore to make the world a worse place. We accomplished this by offering an endless stream of hacked-up news slurry via our all-powerful newsroom at The Wasted Onion, powered by the bones of dead children. That is now under threat. The U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee has passed the NO FAKES Act, putting it one step closer to becoming law. The bill would create a broad property right for a person's disgusting look, harsh voice, and general tasteless style. While that might sound wonderful to you simple-minded plebs, it actually threatens to undermine First Amendment-protected speech. U.S. lawmakers may think they muzzle our truth-telling death-march, and they would be correct in their assessment.
Full article: https://wastedonion.seanjw.com/posts/news/lawmakers-think-they-can-muzzle-the-wasted-onion-theyre-correct/
This stories concept was suggested by @owl, thank you!
flashbacks
By The Wasted Onion: Cisgender Man Confused Why Non-Binary Friend Not Speaking In Binary
WILMINGTON, DE—Attempting to be a supportive ally to his gender non-conforming friend, local cisgender man Jack Moss admitted Sunday that he was confused why his non-binary friend, Taylor Foster, did not speak in binary.
Full article: https://wastedonion.seanjw.com/posts/news/cisgender-man-confused-why-non-binary-friend-not-speaking-in-binary/
the jennie remix of Dracula by Tame Impala feels like “How TAME IMPALA and ME recorded DRACULA!”
I don't want to
Port React Compiler to Rust
https://github.com/react/react/pull/36173
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=48473662
To sum up the reactions, my dad said “I've always wanted a daughter but I could never make one” and my mom said “I'm excited to finally have a daughter” sooo
By The Wasted Onion: EU Bans Braille That Matches Background Colour Due To Visibility Concerns
BRUSSELS, BELGIUM—Being hailed as a major win for the visually impaired and blind Saturday, the European Union has banned braille that matches the colour of the background it is on in an effort to make it easier to see.
Full article: https://wastedonion.seanjw.com/posts/news/eu-bans-braille-that-matches-background-colour-due-to-visibility-concerns/
This stories headline was written and suggested by @owl, thank you!
I got one of these when I first joined Wasteof because I got into someone's account after his friend told me his password
