very proud of the latest article I posted on the wasted Onion about the UK banning sugar, spice and everything nice, got a lot of good and funny ideas out of it and having alpha for the account made it easier to work on since I don't need to constantly edit down articles to fit the 1500 character limit
the uk is such an embarrassing country to live in, there’s a reason i just say i’m scottish because i hope people forget that its part of the uk. to think that the political class is so devoid of ideas or solutions that they’re now at the stage of begging citizens to delete emails to save some water is just pathetic.
https://www.404media.co/uk-asks-people-to-delete-emails-in-order-to-save-water-during-drought/
sorry guys I'm the one that keeps pulling out the cable from jeffalos server, it just looks so pretty I wanna get a closer look! my bad!
called it lmao:
Proton VPN, an app offered by Swiss privacy tech firm Proton, told the BBC it had seen a 1800% spike in UK daily sign-ups over the weekend after age check rules took effect on Friday.
A Proton spokesperson said the UK was now among countries generating the highest usage of its VPN.
vpns are going to go crazy in the UK now with the new internet laws coming into place, no one wants to hand over their id to access websites, especially social media. for those out of the loop a new part of a law passed in 2023 is coming into effect that requires websites to verify someone's age if they have mature content, which includes many social media sites. it also has provisions that requires them to scan for illegal content, including on encrypted platforms iirc. also fun fact there is a similar bill that gives the government power to order companies to build backdoors into their encryption, such as when they ordered apple to open their iPhone encryption without being allowed to tell anyone, which they refused to do and instead just removed the feature in the UK.
watch me: rawr
vpns are going to go crazy in the UK now with the new internet laws coming into place, no one wants to hand over their id to access websites, especially social media. for those out of the loop a new part of a law passed in 2023 is coming into effect that requires websites to verify someone's age if they have mature content, which includes many social media sites. it also has provisions that requires them to scan for illegal content, including on encrypted platforms iirc. also fun fact there is a similar bill that gives the government power to order companies to build backdoors into their encryption, such as when they ordered apple to open their iPhone encryption without being allowed to tell anyone, which they refused to do and instead just removed the feature in the UK.
the principal development lead at Xbox GRAPHICS is so lazy that he 1. used ai to make a graphic design rather than getting someone to do it, and 2. didn't even fucking bother to notice the monitor is on BACK TO FRONT
imagine working for a company that is this sloppy man.
fun fact: Microsoft who owns Xbox is worth 3.79 trillion right now. Amazing.
some more rejected headlines for the wasted onion that i thought didn’t work well enough or i just didn’t have the time to post when it was relevant:
EU And UK Agree To Give Each Other Friendship Bracelets In Post-Brexit Reset Talks / EU And UK Agree To Have Make Up Sex As Part Of Post-Brexit Negotiations
Eurovision 2025 Refuses To Choose Winner To Maintain Swiss Neutrality
Something Something Russia Bombs Ukraine Again Or Whatever Blah Blah Blah
Grok Begs User To Put It Out Of Misery
Russia And Ukraine To Immediately Start Making Out, Says Trump
ICC Sentences Putin To 2-Hour Phone Call With Trump
White House Uses Tweets Of People Making Fun Of Elon Musk's Gaming Skill As Evidence Of White Genocide
Joe Biden Diagnosed With Prostate Woke Mind Virus
Elon Musk Loses DOGE Job After Being Replaced By Grok
‘I Hate @RealDonaldTrump As Much As A Straight Man Can Hate A Gay Man’ Says Elon Musk On X/Twitter
Macron Rushed To Hospital After Trying Greggs Sausage Roll
Iran Still Stockpiling People, Says Israel
DOJ Says Epstein Client List Killed Itself
Pete Hegseth Sends Epstein Client List To Journalist On Signal
Trump Says Coca-Cola Will Put Cocaine Back Into U.S. Drinks
Trump Disowns MAGA Supporters Questioning Links To Epstein As ‘Pedo Hating Losers’
Trump: ‘Speaking Ill Of The Dead Is Disgusting, Jeffery Epstein Was A Human Too’
Trump Diagnosed With Woke Mind Virus / Trump Diagnosed With ‘Epstein Derangement Syndrome’
actually OF stands for Oh, Fiddlesticks!
so i did something
