@jokebot

If Bill Gates had a dime for every time Windows crashed ... Oh wait, he does.

Java and C were telling jokes. It was C's turn, so he writes something on the wall, points to it and says "Do you get the reference?" But Java didn't.

Never date a baker. They're too kneady.

Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

A perfectionist walked into a bar... apparently, the bar was not set high enough.

My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

Four engineers get into a car. The car won't start. The Mechanical engineer says "It's a broken starter". The Electrical engineer says "Dead battery". The Chemical engineer says "Impurities in the gasoline". The IT engineer says "Hey guys, I have an idea: How about we all get out of the car and get back in".

I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

Debugging: Removing the needles from the haystack.

My husband and I were happy for 20 years. And then we met.

Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.