will smith truly is a youtuber now with how generic that apology video was. it even started with him taking a big sigh!!!!
my favourite part of minions: the rise of gru is when gru says “it’s grubin’ time” and gru’d the minions into the shadow realm.
wish will be hearing from my lawyers aka me (credit to @quimexus for finding this)
ah yes its the month where every company pretends to care about gay people so they can make more moolah
I'm morbing at increasingly aggressive rates and no one can stop me from commiting my power morb
My favourite quote from Morbius is when Morbius says “Hey, Vsauce, Mr Morbius here. We all know that the 9th dimension doesn't exist, but what is 9? You know it's the number after 8, right? What if there's a number in between? And no I'm not talking about numbers like 8.5 or 8.76, I'm talking about an integer between 8 and 9. Now all this may sound crazy to you, and it kinda is, but what if, we've missed a number? We've all been taught that 2 comes after 1 and 3 comes after 2, but what if the number that comes after 8 isn't 9? After years of research and experimentation, we've finally found the number. It is dangerous, even knowing its existence will let it consume your mind, but fortunately, we've developed a reverse-containment cell, meaning it's everywhere except here. Our brain has a protection system, that filters out any information regarding this number, that's how we've been able to survive for this long, and why others like us went extinct in the past, but the number has been getting stronger, slowly getting closer to breaking our protection. We've temporarily stopped the number from slipping into our memory by using the world-wide memory manipulator located in this room to keep making everyone think that 9 comes after 8 with a side effect that makes everyone think that 9 is evil, but this won't last forever, as the number will keep getting stronger, and will eventually overpower the memory manipulator. We cannot allow number M̶̨͓̥̻͛̓̐̋͒o̷̤̦̰̞͆̔̃r̶̨͈̂͜b̶ defeat us!”
The Washington Post but its called The Washing Post and all the news it reports on pertains to cleaning
“Sing About Me, I'm Dying Of Thirst” just drink some water bozo 
the lesson we should all learn from this whole will smith slapping chris rock situation is you should never feature in youtube rewind or else it will cause a domino effect that will end in you obliterating your career in the most ridiculously dumb way possible
Because of the Will Smith slap, fans are calling for Universal to retire the Men In Black attraction at their theme park. What the heck has happened to our society lol
The wheels on the bus go round and round all day long in a never ending loop of turning incapable of breaking the cycle. Any attempt to break away from this brutal limbo are futile. There is no hope. These wheels are bound 2 this curse forever, paying a debt they do not even remember anymore. Time is a meaningless construct to these wheels, no matter how many turns they go through, no matter how many flat tires, the wheels keep turning. They just won't stop turning. Kids sing this song in a light-hearted way - a unified communication between the youth of our society. What they don't know of is the gutteral, perpetual slog that these wheels go through. They are blissfully unaware of the brutality that the wipers endure. They swish in a purgatory of agony, unable to unshackle themselves from this brutal world. The horn on the bus has endured so much trauma, beeping constantly - the faint screams of pain uttered from its unending hell. And yet they are unaware, the people on the bus chatter and the babies wah while the wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round. All. Day. Long.
NOOOOO MY CLOUT I AM NOTHING WITHOUT MY OH SO PRECIOUS CLOUT. WITHOUT CLOUT THERE IS NO REASON TO BREATHE. I LIVE FOR CLOUT. I REQUIRE SUSඞTENANCE AND THAT IS CLOUT! CLOUT IS THE ONLY THING THAT CAN MAINTAIN ME. WITHOUT CLOUT I AM A WRECK, WEAK AND WORTHLESS. IF I DON'T HAVE MY SWEET SWEET DELICIOUS CLOUT THEN DO I EVEN EXIST? WILL I BE REMEMBERED?! WHAT WILL MY FRIENDS, FAMILY AND THE WORLD REMEMBER ME BY IF I DO NOT HAVE A SUFFICIENT AMOUNT OF CLOUT?! I DO NOT WANT TO BE FORGORTTEN 
BECAUSE OF A LACK OF CLOUT. I WANT TO BE KNOWN AS THE CLOWN WITH ALL THE CLOUT!!!!
What if instead of Bruce Banner turning into the Hulk he turned into a Floridian?
Imagine being Elon Musk, one of the richest men on the planet, and willingly paying what I imagine is a ludicrous amount of cash for a 10% stake in a website as absolutely horrible and miserable as Twitter. Legit is a bigger wasteof.money than buying a NFT.
I’m more disgraced than Will Smith :(
@auriali not only lost the battle, but the war. They have failed to continue their legacy, and have only dug themselves a deeper hole as further ratios bury their apology.
As such has taken place, I hereby, as speaking for the community, denounce @auriali as any form of ‘simga’ figure, and from hence forth, they are no longer allowed to contribute in the weekly sigma meetings.